Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
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