i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
handjob tips. give me some.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
operation have a gay friend backfired
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
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