...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
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