Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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