Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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