wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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