I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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