I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize