i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Randomize