But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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