yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Randomize