We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
If I die, sorry about rent.
Randomize
