you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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