yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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