i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
