Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
I think my moral compass just broke
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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