I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
