I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
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