google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I see more hoeing in ur future
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