I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
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