the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize