Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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