I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
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Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
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My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.