Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
