70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
My bed is full of blood and feathers
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Randomize
