i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
