have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
