Well apparently he's into motor boating.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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