I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
