Whats the glycemic index on semen?
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize
