I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Randomize
