I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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