I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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