I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
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