Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
His hands were made for my vagina.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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