she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
