I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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