i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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