Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Randomize
