is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
