my mouth tastes like poor choices
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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