do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
