never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
