It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
Hey
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GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
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