idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
Randomize
