I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
