Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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