I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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