Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
