It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Randomize
