Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
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